


Time is Slow and Simple

by LSims



Category: The Prom - Sklar/Beguelin/Martin
Genre: #Motherdaughterconversation, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-04
Updated: 2019-07-04
Packaged: 2020-06-09 14:51:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,521
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19478164
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LSims/pseuds/LSims
Summary: In which Alyssa has a conversation with her mother.





	Time is Slow and Simple

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah I know this isn’t probably how it went down, but I needed some softness in my life.

Alyssa had specifically told her mom that she could get a ride home. (Saying Emma’s name seemed a little risky.) But Helen Greene had insisted, and Alyssa Greene has obeyed. But that didn’t mean she was anymore eager to release from Emma’s embrace.

“You’ll be fine.” She ensured her, but Alyssa still clung tighter. “What if she throws me out of the car?” Emma laughed. “I don’t think your mother will do that.” Alyssa sighed. It seemed pretty out of character for her mother to resort to that, but you never know. Emma put her hands on Alyssa’s shoulders and looked her dead in the eye. “Look, we’ve got our Prom, right? We’re out at school, and no one cares. We are going to have the best time tomorrow, and _nothing_ will stop that. Keep your phone on you, and you know that if anything happens, I will be over there faster than you blink. But that won’t be necessary.” Alyssa looked up. Angie was grinning at her, giving a thumbs up. 

“You’ve got this, kid.” Said Dee Dee. 

“We believe in you!” Trent echoed.

Barry put a hand on her shoulder. “You being out of the house tomorrow will give her time.” He said. “It will be okay.” Then he smiled at Alyssa and hugged her. “Just remember, you have family outside of her.” Her phone dinged, and Alyssa looked at it. Her mother has texted. _Here_. Well, she couldn’t put it off forever. Sticking her chin up in front of her, Alyssa pushed open the gym doors and walked out.

The walk to her mother’s car shouldn’t have felt like a death march, but it did. With every step she took, Alyssa’s heart seemed to beat louder and louder. The shine of the silver _Honda_ minivan in front of her seemed to blind the girl. She had never understood why they had a minivan, but her mother said it was for cheer carpools, so she never outwardly questioned it. The metal seemed to burn Alyssa’s hand when she gripped it, and the thud as she slid into her seat and slammed the door shut echoed throughout the whole town.

“Hi.”

Alyssa jumped. She struggled to fit the seatbelt into its holder. “Hi.” She replied shakily. Her mom pulled out of the school and the farther they got, the more suffocated Alyssa felt. 

“What are you wearing tomorrow?”

A diversion. She was grateful. “Oh, um, my purple dress, and my silver sneakers.” Her mother pursed her lips at that, but didn’t say anything accept “Do you want me to help you get ready?” Alyssa didn’t know how to respond to that. The silence laid in the air, and Alyssa hoped this was the end of their conversation. Finally, barely above a whisper, her mother said “How do you know?”

Alyssa sighed in relief. At least these questions were generic, easy. Yet they were still all too personal. She thought about her answer for a minute. “I know...because how I feel about girls, is so _strong_ and _powerful_ , that there is no way it can’t be real. And it feels so _good_ , I mean, it makes me feel so good, and warm, and _happy_ , that I don’t think I would feel that way if it was wrong.” Maybe she shouldn’t have said that. Alyssa watched her mother out of the corner of her eye, but she didn’t seem mad. She just stared straight ahead, driving.

“You know what Leviticus says?” Her mother asked. “Of course I do!” Alyssa snapped. “You think I haven’t stared at it for hours, wondering what was wrong with me, praying that God made me straight?!” Woah, that was harsh. 

“Sorry.” Alyssa said quietly. “That came out wrong.” 

“It’s fine.”

They turned left and drove down the road. Only ten minutes till Alyssa could escape. 

“When did you first know?”

Alyssa shrugged. 

“I mean...I first really came to terms with it in freshman year. But...I think I’ve honestly liked girls ever since I could remember. I mean, I’ve never even _kind_ of thought a boy looked good, but if I try and list all the girls I’ve ever thought we’re pretty, we would be here a while.” Helen snorted at that. Alyssa smiled, but then her mother said “I know I said it before, but...I just want you to be able to live freely, comfortably.” and the burst of anger returned. “Y’know, I hate to break it to you, but I think you were already responsible for making my life pretty hard, even when you thought I was straight. Not to mention it’s people like you who _make_ my life hard.” She didn’t apologize for that. 

“I know,” her mother said with a sigh. “and I’m sorry. And I’m not gonna accept this right off the bat.” 

“I’m not asking you to.” 

“But, Alyssa Margaret Greene,” Alyssa looked at her mother upon hearing her full name. “I want you to know that _I love you_ no matter what. And you— _liking girls_ —won’t change that.” Alyssa was on the verge of tears. “I used to think I had to take this to the grave with me because if anyone found out, I would die, and I thought the killing would be at your hand.” Now it was Helen’s turn to cry. 

“I know, and I’ve done _so many things_ wrong. I have not been the mother I claim to be, and now it’s too late.” Alyssa put her hand on her mother’s shoulder. “Hey, no it’s not. You still have the rest of your life to fix your mistakes. I still love you.” 

“I’m _going_ to fix them.” Helen said, promising herself. She turned to Alyssa with a sad smile. “Did I ever tell you about your father?”

After Alyssa’s shake of the head, Helen took a deep breath. “I met your father my final year of college. I was at the University of Indianapolis for my business degree, as you well know, and he was taking a higher level class, though he was in the year below me. We were just acquaintances, but we were grew closer, much to the disapproval of my family and friends. Now I know this was the early two-thousands, but, well, you know what my family is like. We were never really serious, just having a little fling, so to say, but I decided to let myself hang loose one night and went to a Christmas party with him. We had a lot to drink and well, you were soon created. Both King and I panicked, because we still had so much left, and of course our families freaked out. My mother blamed me, saying I should’ve never fallen for someone like him, and you know what she meant by that, but I insisted that we make it work. King and I _did_ , for awhile, but then he started growing more and more distant, I figured he was just busy with school, as we all were, but when I went into labor, he never showed. Mother had a field day with this, of course, talking about how men of his kind were lazy deadbeats, etcetera, etcetera, But I wouldn’t here it. I told her to be quiet and let me rest. When I got home from the hospital, I sat my family down and made them promise to love you no matter what you looked like. They’ve kept their word, for now. A month or so later, King’s sister called me and told me what had happened: He couldn’t handle the thought of being a father so soon, and he flaked on me. He was ashamed and terribly sorry, but apparently that was the end of our relationship. I’ve spent seventeen years believing that maybe he was wrong, but what was truly wrong was that I let that rob me of forming a real relationship with you.”

The words touched Alyssa, they truly did. But she had to say something first. “That really sucks Mom, truly, but how is your relationship with a man of a different race any different then my relationship with a woman?”

“It’s not.”

The response left an open door to both mother and daughter. Finally, Alyssa said. “You know, I’ve always reasoned that you were so controlling because you thought you could turn me into a better version of yourself, but now, after this conversation, I realize that you were also just trying to keep me from screwing up like you did, to give me the life you never got to have.” Helen smiled. “Both of those statements are correct, Alyssa.”

The minivan had now pulled into the driveway, but no one got out. Alyssa turned to her mother and prayed that what she was about ask was not a mistake. “Mom, it’s completely okay if you’re not ready for this, but, do you think, sometime soon, if you’re not busy, we could have Emma over for dinner? I mean obviously I have to ask her cause she’s probably not ready either but—” Helen held up a hand.

“Okay.”

And it was.


End file.
